Sexual problems

Sexual problems affect many people, but we don't tend to talk about them. They are often experienced as isolating and very distressing.

Sex is complex. It has biological, psychological and emotional components. Some sexual problems are purely physical, resulting from a disability, an illness or side effects from medication, for example. Your GP can discuss options for treatment of these types of sexual problems.

However, most sexual problems are psychological.

Why is sex difficult for many people?

Sexual problems are typically caused by one or more of:

  • growing up hearing negative messages about sex, for example that it is dirty or immoral
  • poor sex education
  • past sexual trauma
  • hormonal changes, for example during pregnancy or menopause
  • previous negative sexual encounters
  • relationship issues
  • low self-confidence
  • anxiety
  • difficulty relaxing

Anxiety plays a large part in sexual problems. It is very hard to have enjoyable, satisfying sex if you are anxious. For this reason, sexual problems tend to be cyclical. Once you have a bad sexual experience, anxiety about it happening again can make it harder to relax and enjoy your next sexual experience.

Another key factor is the fact that sex and sexual problems are not openly discussed in our society. People experiencing sexual problems often don’t realise just how many other people are going through the same thing, or that sexual problems can be successfully treated. 

In relationships, discussing sex can feel awkward and scary. People will often avoid sex rather than discuss it. This allows problems to fester and worsen with time.

When two people with differing libidos and sexual preferences come together in a relationship, there are bound to be some points of friction. One partner may want to try sexual acts that the other isn’t comfortable with. One may want to open up the relationship while the other prefers monogamy. Or one partner may simply want sex more often than the other. Sometimes these differences can be worked out, but sometimes they cause the sexual relationship to break down.

Our clients have reported great results!

Counselling for sexual problems

Counselling for sexual problems can be undertaken on your own or with your partner. It can be with a psychotherapist, a relationship therapist or a psychosexual therapist. Psychosexual therapists have had further training in sexual issues and are knowledgeable in how to treat particular sexual issues. These include:

  • loss of desire
  • premature ejaculation
  • painful sex
  • erectile problems
  • vaginismus
  • inability to orgasm.
Whichever therapist you see, you will be treated with respect, empathy and warmth. Our therapists won’t judge you for your sexual preferences, your sexual experience (or lack of) or anything else. We are experienced in working with a wide range of sexual practices, including gay and straight, kink and polyamory. If you prefer to speak to a male or female therapist, just let us know when setting up your first appointment.

The thought of discussing sex with a stranger may be off-putting. Experienced therapists are used to these sensitive conversations. They use straightforward, culturally-appropriate language and quickly put you at ease. Most clients are surprised by how quickly their initial anxiety is alleviated. Counselling sessions are always confidential.

To take the next step, please contact us.

You need not suffer with your sexual problem alone – let us help

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Counselling for individuals

Personal counselling can be about anything that is on your mind.

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Couples counselling

Couples counselling provides space for couples to discuss problems in their relationship and find solutions.

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Our therapists

We have over 30 qualified and experienced therapists to choose from.

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One Therapy London

Counselling, psychotherapy, couples counselling in London since 2006

Lara Vasey

Lara is an integrative therapist who offers short- and longer-term therapy to individuals Starting therapy can feel daunting, but Lara’s warm demeanour helps her clients feel more comfortable She creates a confidential and non-judgemental environment, which enables her clients to open up about their thoughts, feelings and experiences With empathy and curiosity, her...

Kensington

Therapist Jayne Levy
Jayne Levy

Jayne has a gentle and empathic approach, allowing clients to feel comfortable and relaxed as they begin therapy She offers a non-judgmental and confidential space where clients are safe to express their feelings and thoughts and explore some of the difficulties and challenges they may be experiencing As a humanistic integrative therapist, Jayne is guided by her...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Aaron McGuinness
Aaron McGuinness

Aaron offers a psychodynamic approach to psychotherapy which emphasises the unconscious mind and its influence on clients’ behaviour It often involves exploring past experiences and their impact on present-day thoughts and feelings Aaron creates a safe and supportive environment where clients can express themselves freely without fear of judgment Aaron is open to...

Oxford Circus

Kensington

Therapist Geraldine Lothian
Geraldine Lothian

Geraldine (she/her) is a psychodynamic psychotherapist who works with individuals Geraldine’s style of therapy is to work collaboratively with her clients and at each client’s pace  It is sometimes difficult to make the decision to start therapy but Geraldine works together with her clients to address any issues that may feel difficult to explore on their own ...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Yussef Ferguson
Yussef Ferguson

Yussef is a psychodynamic psychotherapist who offers both long and short term personal therapy to individuals He has experience of working with a diverse range of clients and can provide a warm, confidential space to explore and gain insight into any past or present personal difficulties and experiences Yussef works with issues such as anxiety, depression, loss,...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Marta Pisarri
Marta Pisarri

Marta is a psychologist and an integrative psychotherapist: she has been working in the field of mental health for over 12 years in both private and public sectors She provides psychotherapeutic support to individuals and families Marta provides individual therapy for those who struggle to manage life's challenges, want to improve their relationships, discard thoughts...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Shelly Klein
Shelley Klein

As a psychodynamic therapist Shelley brings a wealth of experience to her work and supports her patients to talk about those aspects of their lives they are finding painful, upsetting or difficult to deal with, in a confidential, non-judgmental and peaceful setting Shelley is particularly interested in working with those who are experiencing depression, bereavement, high...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Stamatia Lorentzou
Stamatia Lorentzou

A senior therapist, Stamatia has been with One Therapy London for many years She holds a doctorate in counselling psychology and is a registered psychotherapist Stamatia knows it can be difficult to understand or cope with the strong feelings that life’s experiences can sometimes bring Talking with an experienced therapist is a way of thinking things through and...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Evan Bates
Evan Bates

Evan is a psychodynamic therapist, offering both long and short term therapy He creates a non-judgemental and reflective space to help clients explore their difficulties and concerns Working together to understand the connections between past and current relationships, Evan supports clients in developing a deeper awareness of their recurring emotional patterns and further...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Ben Brackenbury
Ben Brackenbury

Ben believes that at times we all struggle with the challenges life has to offer and therapy provides a safe, confidential, non-judgemental space to explore this Ben works with individuals to make sense of who they are and how they respond to the world today, and to explore new ways of being Ben is also sensitive to how difficult it might be for a client to talk to a...

Oxford Circus