Ageing, death and dying

Although we all know that one day we will die, we are generally reluctant to think about death. We live our lives as if we are going to be around forever.

This avoidance of thoughts around death is a natural defence. It would be very distressing if our own mortality was constantly at the front of our minds. However, as we get older or face illness, reality breaks through the defence and we are sometimes confronted with painful thoughts and feelings about dying.

Talking about our mortality with loved ones can be challenging, particularly when they still want to deny the inevitable. That’s when therapy can be really helpful. A therapist can listen to your distress without pushing it away or being overwhelmed by it. Just speaking your thoughts and feelings about death out loud can be very healing in itself.

You may also feel confused or conflicted about your mortality. Our ideas about death and the meaning of life are shaped by our culture, religion and family, as well as our previous experiences of others’ deaths. Understanding these influences in therapy will help you to accept your mortality with clarity.

Those who know they are going to die soon often experience a whole mix of emotions, and it can be helpful to explore these in counselling. They may feel relief that their pain will end, sadness about leaving their loved ones, anger that their life is being cut short, anxiety around what comes after death, and more.

The challenges of older age

Ageing brings many challenges aside from the increased awareness of mortality. It can be frightening and frustrating, especially in a culture that celebrates youth. 

Growing older may involve, for example:

  • losing friends and loved ones
  • loneliness and isolation
  • regrets over how you’ve lived your life
  • fear and frustration around any physical deterioration
  • worry about the future

Of course, the later stages of life can be a happy time too. Often people have mixed feelings about ageing. For those who are struggling, though, counselling can help. 

Sadly, counselling still has a stigma among some older people. Fearful of being seen as weak, they endeavour to deal with their pain alone. There’s nothing weak about coming to therapy. It’s a brave decision and one that can improve your life immeasurably.

Our clients have reported great results!

Mr K
“I was attending sessions at One Therapy practice for about 1 1/2 years. I am very happy with the result, sessions there really helped me. I am really grateful to my therapist. Someone recommended him to me as a high professional and it proved right, thank you.”
Mrs M
“I can only provide positive comments on my sessions with (my therapist). This was my first experience with a therapist, and she managed to make me feel comfortable. And I must say that the sessions were helpful and efficient.”
Mrs E
“My therapist was extremely helpful, considerate and understanding. I felt she properly understood what the issues I had were, and their underlying causes, and I feel I benefited considerably from the sessions with her.”
Mrs N
“I immediately felt completely at ease as they were very professional while showing genuine care and interest in helping me. I was able to confront many issues which I had so far chosen to ignore despite their negative effects on my personal relationships and happiness. I would have no hesitation in recommending (One Therapy) to anyone looking to improve their relationships and self-esteem.”
Mrs L
“I learned a lot about myself and about the relationships I make with other people. I was able to see where I was going wrong and I now make better personal choices. Thank you, again.”
Mrs R
“I can’t thank you enough for the help and support I got from my appointments. I would highly recommend therapy to anyone now. Therapy helped me in more ways than I could have imagined. Please tell (my therapist) how grateful I am for her help.”

Death anxiety in younger adults

Death anxiety is fairly common in people of all ages, even when death is not imminent. Healthy younger people can become hyper-aware of their own mortality, leading to a persistent and irrational fear of death. 

Anxiety about death can be very distressing and may prevent people from engaging fully in life. Often, anxiety around death is inherited, so it can be useful to explore your family’s attitudes to death in therapy. In this way, you will develop a more realistic, less anxious relationship with death.

Death anxiety can also follow trauma. Near-death experiences naturally make us more aware of our mortality. For some this can feel positive, encouraging them to live life to the fullest. For others, life following the trauma feels too dangerous and they restrict their activities to keep risks at bay. Therapy can help with the fear and support the client to, at their own pace, start living more fully again.

What to expect in counselling

When I trained as a psychotherapist, me and my fellow students were given the assignment of doing something we’d never done before. The course tutors wanted us to get in touch with how scary it can be to do something new, to feel the fear of the unknown. I chose to …

Read more

How does therapy help?

Over the years that I’ve worked as a therapist, I’ve been asked numerous times by prospective clients, “How does counselling help?”  And I’ve yet to come up with a satisfactory answer. Not because I’m in any doubt that it helps, but because the ‘how’ bit is so hard to articulate concisely…

Read more

Counselling for individuals

Personal counselling can be about anything that is on your mind.

Read more

Couples counselling

Couples counselling provides space for couples to discuss problems in their relationship and find solutions.

Read more

Our therapists

We have over 30 qualified and experienced therapists to choose from.

Read more

One Therapy London

Counselling, psychotherapy, couples counselling in London since 2006

Nina Jacobson - Therapist
Nina Jacobson

Nina is an integrative psychotherapist who creates a safe, non-judgmental space in which clients feel comfortable to explore their thoughts, feelings and patterns of behaviour Nina recognises that it can be useful to talk to someone outside your circle of friends and family to gain an understanding of your challenges and emotions She helps clients think about their...

Oxford Circus

Damla Ciftcioglu - Therapist
Berrak Damla Çiftcioğlu

Damla offers psychodynamic psychotherapy in a supportive and confidential environment where you can explore the emotions, behaviours and challenges shaping your life Her approach focuses on understanding the deeper, often unconscious factors influencing your thoughts and experiences Whether you’re navigating a specific situation or grappling with long-standing personal...

Oxford Circus

Lara Vasey

Lara is an integrative therapist who offers short- and longer-term therapy to individuals Starting therapy can feel daunting, but Lara’s warm demeanour helps her clients feel more comfortable She creates a confidential and non-judgemental environment, which enables her clients to open up about their thoughts, feelings and experiences With empathy and curiosity, her...

Kensington / Notting Hill

Gregory Hamlin - Therapist
Gregory Hamlin

Gregory is a psychodynamic therapist offering both short-term and long -term therapy to individuals He appreciates how difficult it can be to seek help and therefore places great importance on creating a warm, empathic and safe space for clients to explore whatever is on their minds Gregory helps individuals uncover and understand the underlying patterns that shape...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Michelle Taylor
Michelle Taylor

Michelle is an accredited psychodynamic therapist providing a calm and confidential space to allow her clients to unravel their deepest anxieties whilst feeling understood Michelle has particular experience working with adults experiencing bereavement and loss, anxiety, and depression Michelle also works with clients with work related issues, relationship issues and those...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Antonella Bonetti
Antonella Bonetti

Antonella is a psychodynamic therapist offering short- and long-term therapy to adults She also sees couples facing issues within their relationship Since obtaining her Master’s degree in Psychodynamic Counselling and Psychotherapy, Antonella has worked in different organisational settings (charities, NHS and university counselling services) helping people from...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Asma Gharbi
Asma Gharbi

Asma offers psychodynamic, humanistic and integrative therapies to individuals and couples She tailors her approach to meet the needs and preferences of her clients She offers short and long term therapy Asma provides a non-judgemental space for her clients, where they can feel safe to explore their feelings, make sense of their experiences and forge deep lasting...

Oxford Circus

Kensington / Notting Hill

Therapist Stamatia Lorentzou
Stamatia Lorentzou

A senior therapist, Stamatia has been with One Therapy London for many years She holds a doctorate in counselling psychology and is a registered psychotherapist Stamatia knows it can be difficult to understand or cope with the strong feelings that life’s experiences can sometimes bring Talking with an experienced therapist is a way of thinking things through and...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Shelly Klein
Shelley Klein

As a psychodynamic therapist Shelley brings a wealth of experience to her work and supports her patients to talk about those aspects of their lives they are finding painful, upsetting or difficult to deal with, in a confidential, non-judgmental and peaceful setting Shelley is particularly interested in working with those who are experiencing depression, bereavement, high...

Bloomsbury

Jayne Levy - Therapist
Jayne Levy

Jayne has a gentle and empathic approach, allowing clients to feel comfortable and relaxed as they begin therapy She offers a non-judgmental and confidential space where clients are safe to express their feelings and thoughts and explore some of the difficulties and challenges they may be experiencing As a humanistic integrative therapist, Jayne is guided by her...

Oxford Circus